Parenting

Hello world,

I have just a few minutes before John or J2 as he is sometimes refered to (thanks Emma) wakes up. Today was the first day that I had both boys by myself. Not a big deal, since I took James to day care, but I was at home with John and did all the Mr. Mom things, and he behaved well. I worked a bit while he slept. He didn't even wake up when I used the drill, which is way different than James. I just wanted to ask parents what they've learned through their kids. I have learned a lot about myself through the naughty stage that James has been going through. I learned that I jump too quickly to wanting to spank, I learned that I want my kids to be as close to perfect as possible, I learned that I can have patience and pity if I'm in the right frame of mind. But when I'm tired and stressed, I don't tolerate much. I used to think I was so easy going, and I am most of the time, but I take my kids discipline seriously, and I don't want them to be brats, or greedy, or inconsiderate kids and adults. But they are not my kids, they are Gods, and I have to keep praying for wisdom on how to raise them. I don't know if there will be unique challenges to raising two boys, but I suspect that they will fight, and compete, which is ok as long as they do it lovingly. :) I think i'm pretty naive here, but I can hope. In any case, God continues to teach me a lot through my journey as a parent. I think I'm becoming a better pastor because of them as well. Now if I can only make more time to visit people and work on my sermons more... that is my earnest prayer. Amen.

John Bunyan Cocar

Greetings folks!

It's been a crazy few months at the Cocar household. This summer has been spent getting ready for the arrival of our new baby boy, John Bunyan Cocar. He finally came on August 27th at 3:25 AM. He was a bit of a surprise, not having him, but how early he was. We were thrilled to have such a healthy boy, he was 7lbs. 11oz. and 21 in. long. James is adjusting very well to his baby brother. Two days after we brought John home, James fell in the driveway and broke his collarbone. He was in a sling and ace bandage for a few days, which got him some more attention than usual, that has helped the transition. He is on the mend now and is without a bandage, we are looking forward to his birthday party this Saturday.
Rachel has been a doing remarkably well after the delivery. She was up and about a day after the surgery, and has not needed much pain medication. Thank you for all the prayers, God has certainly had mercy on us. Although, we don't sleep very well since John wakes up every 2 hours, we have been blessed.
I have felt a bit awkward not going to church for the past two weeks, but it's been good to spend time with the boys and Rachel. Also Jim and Arden Olsen, (Rachel's parents) have been here for the past two weeks. Life is getting back to normal, and now we just have to adjust to two boys. They say going from one to two is the hardest and I don't know if I want to find out if they are right or not. I think two boys is enough for us to handle. Praise the Lord they are healthy and we are doing well.
So that's where we're at, I promise my future posts will be more about theology and/or home improvement, but for now I have to catch up on my sleep.

Good Night.

My adventures in plumbing

Greetings cyberspace,

It's been a few months since my last post, but things are fairly much the same. Our house is still under construction, my son is still not potty trained (working on it), the church is doing well, could always be better, and Rachel is still very much pregnant, but doing well. So life is good. My current project has been to put in a toilet into our basement. We had this huge walk in shower that was probably 6x6, way too big for a shower, so we decided to add a toilet. Last Wednesday I broke up a bit of concrete and made a hole big enough and deep enough to see that there is a clay pipe right under where I wanted to put the toilet. I was unsure so I asked around and it turned out that it wasn't that big a deal, except clay pipes are really delicate, they are really thick, but they crack easily. So the hole got a lot bigger real fast, and I exposes the pipes pretty much all the way around. There is the main stack for the house which is cast iron and a floor drain from the laundry room all going to this clay pipe. And wouldn't you know it, it was cracked. There was sewage leaking into the ground, it was all mud, so nasty. Anyways I should have waited for plumber, but I was impatient and didn't want sewage spilling into the basement. So I broke off the pipe and that's where I got stuck, I've never done a ton of plumbing so I didn't know what I was doing, but I knew someone who did.

The guy who told me what to do in the first place, a deacon at the church, Ed, volunteered to come over and help me fix the problem. I was ready to patch it back together and forget about it, but he knows how to do this kind of work and he was willing to help. It worked out really well because he was planning on coming to Vacation Bible School with his wife to help out, and he said he'd just come help me instead. He's a great guy, totally humble and kind, honest and hard working, my kind of guy. So we worked for 2 hours to get it all fixed up and ready to be used as a sewer again. He let me grind off the clay pipe, which I did, fairly well, I prayed before each cut, because if it broke off it would break off too deep and we couldn't get a rubber gasket on it. This happened once, but we were able to fix it. So now we have to finish putting the shower drain in, fill the hole back up with sand, then top it off with concrete, and finally add the toilet and build a glass wall in between. Piece of cake. I learned a lot this week, not much of it theological but I learned about ID and OD, important plumbing things to know. I hope my sermon this Sunday didn't suffer for lack of more preparation time. Lord knows I could always spend more time preparing. I trust in God's goodness and mercy. I didn't feel like I left the people with that one importnat thought, but it was more of an experience of loving other people. I pray that it was honoring to God.

Peace.

Since Christmas

Greeting blog readers... its been four months since my last post, but it feels like only yesterday. A lot has happened since Dec. Most notably James is so much bigger and wiser. He talks more than Rachel and I do, and he's always on the go. Although recently he has learned to sit still and do one activity at a time. He has even started sitting at the table with Rachel and I. He's a great kid, and I'm proud to be his dad. One thing that is not so great is that he has yet to sit through church. On Easter he sat/squirmed through the first 15/20 minutes until childrens sermon, then went downstairs to play. I think at almost three I was sitting through church, although throughout my childhood I was always trying to find out ways to get out of church. But I'm sure as he matures he'll learn to sit through church. We'll have to make sure it's not too boring... :)
Speaking of church, that is going well. It could always be better, but I'm thrilled with how well everyone works together and how God's Spirit is present and working. There are certainly challenges, but compared to other pastors and situations, we're very fortunate. God continues to be so good to us.
On the house front we have almost finished renovating our kitchen, it's be a LOT of work, and a lot of money, but it's looking good, and we're happy to have a functional kitchen that is safe and convenient.
More theological discussions to come...
Peace

the problem of evil

Recently Rachel and I were given a book about the Tsunami that happened in Asia back in the Christmas of 20o4. I remember some of the devastation, but didn't really grapple with it back then. I was still in seminary and newly married, so the event passed by like so many other tragic events. This book is entitle "Where is God in the Tsunami?" I don't usually need a dictionary when I read a book, but I do with this book. But regardless, it's a good read about the problem of evil. Why did the tsunami take place? Who is to blame? Can we say that God punished those sinful people, like some preachers claimed right after the event? The author Hart is arguing against atheists that say, "See look, there is so much evil and devastation, how could there possibly be an all powerful, all loving God?" The old question of, if there is an all loving and all powerful God, how could there be evil. Either he is not all loving, or he is not powerful enough to stop it. These are good questions, how can we as mature Christians answer these people who look at the world and say, there can't be a loving God.

I know how I would respond, right now. I'll let you all know if I get an new insight into this answer from the book. What do you all think of how to asnwer this historically difficult question?

Fall...literally

Well the reason for my absence to this blog site has been due to a small but painful condition, called a hernia. I got it late August, early Sept. I was not paying attention to some of the things I was doing, and I was lifting heavy things and playing with James, (ie. throwing him up in the air), and doing some wood working, etc... And then I started having a pain in my right side. Nothing big at first, just some discomfort, but in a few days it was really hurting. Went to the doctor to have it fixed, and I had to wait for two weeks. I went to Rockford to see a dr. there and it was the same story, two weeks. So I waited in pain, I preached in pain, and then the week I was supposed to have surgery I got sick. I had a fever of 101.5 [ there was a rumor at the high school that i had a fever of 105, I think i'd be dead]. Anyways, my surgery got pushed back to last friday. It went alright I guess. I was hoping it wasn't as painful as it turned out to be. And the wierd part is that the incision is painful, but my HIP, oh... my hip really hurts. It feels like someone is tearing my hip off when I move it just right... But all the pain as subsided in recent days, I'm able to do things now, like stand up straight, walk, move, things I couldn't do before. We'll see how I do preaching on Sunday. So that's where I've been. So I haven't been to volleyball much until yesterday, and we had a home game, which we WON!!! It was great to beat a team that had beaten us so much in the past few years. We're definitely not where I want us to be, but we're getting there. The season will probably be over before we reach our full potential, but it was a good win.
On the home front, Rachel is eager to have me back to full strength. I haven't been able to help out with James too much because I can't lift him, and even putting on his pants this morning hurt becuase he squirmed too much, and it hurts for me to twist and move quickly. That's life.
I hope you all are well.
May God bless you, and watch over you. I know He has me and my family.

Peace

Cubs

I thought I'd share my thoughts and feelings on the Chicago Cubs. I never played baseball in my life, except for church softball the past three years or so. But I have watched the Cubs since the late 80's when Ryno was playing second base. I started following the team more closely in seminary when I discovered talk radio kept me awake and interested on my long drives home. I was very excited when they were just five outs away from a World Series, but they broke my heart yet again after that series. What is it about the Cubs that keeps them from winning. Even when they have one of the highest pay roles in all of baseball. Can the explination be the curse, do those things even exist? I think they do. The Bible certainly has it's fair share of stories about someone being cursed. The most famous that comes to mind is that in Deuteronomy it says that anyone who is hung on a tree is cursed. Then Paul uses that as a way to explain Christ's sacrifice for us, that he took upon himself the curse that was meant for us, because of our disobedience and sin. So He who knew no sin, became sin for us.
So are the Cubs cursed, it would seem so. But more than anything, I think it's a self fulfilling prophecy. They have not won, and have been told they won't win, and so they play into it. There is a concept in Scripture called, logidzomai (Greek), that basically means calling something that is not as if it is. Saying to someone that is unpleasant, I hope you are having a good day. Or to someone who is a thief, thanks for being so honest. Paul uses this when he talks about the saints, live a life worthy of the calling you have recieved. You might not being living it now, but you can and should. In other places he calls the people saints, even though we know they were far from that. It is a way to encourage others.
We need to practice some logidzomai on the Cubs...
Currently they are six games behind the dreaded Cardinals, we'll see how the rest of the season progresses, I'm hoping against hope that they start playing better. But if not, there is always next year.

Blessings to you all, and especially all the Cub fans.

Peace